“The Looking Glass Self”  
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T2YLAYCJvyk

Imagination, belief, interpretation, and perception play a crucial role in all four aspects. The behavior or presentation is not how we "actually" behave or present ourselves but how we believe we have behaved or presented ourselves. The reaction by others is not their "actual" reaction but how we believe they reacted. The reflection is not how they "actually" perceived and reacted to the behavior but how we believe they perceived and reacted to it. Self-evaluation is a reconstruction in our heads of how the reaction matches to our Self-Concept.

Since younger children's Self-Concept is underdeveloped, the looking-glass self in earlier stages of life is more learning than evaluating. Through this looking-glass process, the child accumulates a set of beliefs and evaluations about themselves, who and what they are and what that means in social relations. That becomes their Self-Concept.

The "looking-glass self" now becomes added to imitation and routination to form the basic building blocks for socialization. Social life is not like a game or organized sport or formal organization. There is no handbook, rule book, guide book, or written policies and procedures. Culture is learned by trial-and-error. Children behave in some way and then monitor and evaluate how others, especially parents, react to that behavior. If the reaction is positive (reward), the behavior is validated and it's safe to repeat. If the reaction is negative (punishment), the behavior will be avoided or done in secret. Through such testing and observing, children learn culture. This is the "looking-glass self."

By monitoring the reactions of others, the child themselves in how our behavior is reflected back to us, hence the looking-glass (mirror) analogy. The looking-glass self has four elements:

1. Behavior or "presentation of self"

2. Reaction by others based upon their perception and evaluation of the behavior or presentation

3. A "reflected image of self" based on an evaluation of that reaction

4. Self-evaluation or judgment based on that reflected image (often an emotional feeling like shame, pride, happiness, anger, etc.)                  

The “Looking Glass Self”
Symbolic interactionism and the formation of self-image via reflection 

1. Ask the partners to talk to one another for ten minutes about any issue that might interest them--you could choose the topic of conversation or have them choose it.

2. After the ten-minute conversations have ended, have each student write a paragraph on the topic, "My Partner's Personality." Be sure to urge students to be both truthful and gentle in their descriptions, and not to show what they have written to their partner just yet.

3. Next, have all students write a paragraph on the topic, "What My Partner Thinks of My Personality."

4. Have the partners exchange papers, read and discuss them.

5. Finally, as a class, discuss how accurate students' perceptions were of the image their partners formed of their personality. Have students describe the cues they used in assessing their partner's personality, and whether these cues provided accurate or inaccurate information.

Source Link http://wps.ablongman.com/wps/media/objects/634/649505/Ch3.pdf

Additional Resources: The "Self Magazine" web page has many examples of the strategies people use to influence people's opinions about themselves. See their homepage at http://www.phys.com and cruise around for ideas.